I love the smell of a fire on a crisp, chilly night.

I want to spend time with you like eternity wrapped in an effervescent cycle of sunrise and sunsets.

One day you’re going to be sitting on an armchair and you’ll tell your kids of the time when we used to have so many arguments and that in one of our major arguments, you would tell them that even in the heat of our negative words, once I looked into your eyes I couldn’t help but laugh… You would tell them of the time that I fell in love.
- Trouble
J: I have never felt this comfortable with someone.
C: Yeah! I don't understand why I'm this comfortable.
J: I know! You know sometimes I question why it's so easy being with you.
C: Why is it so easy being with you?!

Today was a day I once thought would never come. Someone strong enough was able to handle and impress my entire family. From the carefree side to the conservative side, everyone is at ease.

The moment that truly made my day was when we were in the first living room with the family elders. It began with my biological grandmother feeling anxious about her age. Then, one of my clan grandfathers told my biological grandmother that she must be able to wait at least ten years. Everyone wondered why it had to be ten years. Then my clan grandfather looked at me and teased, “well, you would want to see your granddaughter get married then you’ll have beautiful great grandchildren because your grandson-in-law is handsome.” As soon as I comprehended what those words meant and I looked around the room at everyone with their big smiles, I just felt complete joy.

Ever since the beginning, I have always wondered how could I possibly have done this. I do not understand how I was able to find the person I want to spend the rest of my life with this easy. There may be challenges and burdens but one look and all of those temporary emotions are gone. We continue to return and choose joy.

It is ironic that I used to find what happy married couples share about how they found their significant other appalling. I was wrong. It is true what they say. When the right person comes, you just know. 

I simply cannot comprehend the joy radiating from the corners of my lips to the glow in my eyes. A friend of mine once told me that happiness is the mere temperature of the room. It changes. On the other hand, joy is the thermostat. It controls happiness. For a moment I thought I was wise in believing that I knew and understood the concept but I was wrong. There is a difference in knowing and understanding compared to experiencing the concept of joy.

Happiness is a fleeting moment. Joy exists throughout. You may feel anger or sadness temporarily but find comfort knowing that joy is patiently waiting for your return. Joy does not leave. It simply continues to exist.

Today, I returned back to joy.

infiltration:

sometimes i realize there are so many things i won’t remember in 50 years like the way the sky looked this morning and all the dogs i saw today and my mom’s voice and i get so sad i never want to forget

(via avatarabby)

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